one time i was eating some chips and salsa with my mom and it was really spicy so i went “i feel like a dragon” because my mouth was fucking on fire and my mom just casually says “you only want to be a dragon so you can have that hiccup boy ride you”
it took her a few moments to realize her mistake
She knows you well
Well is she wrong
still laughing about yesterday during gender/sexuality studies class when our professor had everyone chant “VAGINA! PENIS! VAGINA!” a few times to make us more comfortable with saying those terms
and this girl just stands up slowly and says “…this… this isn’t math class…”
ALRIGHT LISTEN UP IMMA TELL YOU SOME SERIOUS GENDER MARKETING BULLSHIT THAT WENT DOWN TODAY
Today a woman came in to get her 13 year old son’s black iPhone fixed. This thing was totally fucking busted. She was already kind of being bitchy so I’m just trying to reassure her that everything will be fine and shuffle through the paper work so shes on her way. She leaves, I put her phone away till I have time to fix it.
Well come to find out that we were completely out of black screens until next week’s shipment. So I put on a white screen for now and reassure her that when we do get black screens in that I will call her and we’ll put the new screen on for free. Better to have a temporary mixed match phone then a broken one right?
This woman proceeds to flip her shit. “WE CAME HERE TO GET WHAT WE HAD FIXED!” I calmly explain to her that there is nothing I can do about the color for the time being. The son is totally fine with this and obviously embarrassed by his mother’s outburst. The woman snatches the phone, sneers at it, and then shoves it back into my hands and says “NOW IT LOOKS LIKE A GIRL’S PHONE! I AM NOT GIVING THIS TO MY SON!”
At this moment I turn to her and say. “I don’t undersand? How is it a girl’s phone now?”
"Well it was BLACK and now its WHITE!!" She gestured dramatically at the screen like I couldn’t fucking see it.
"How is white a feminine color?"
She huffs and explains that she refuses to take the phone until the color is changed. The 13 is now rapid fire “its fine its fine” cause he just wants his phone back. But she keeps refusing but I finally tell her again that we will change the phone for free when we get black screens and that shes not allowed to keep it here.
The point of the matter is that this woman almost refused to even take back the phone BECAUSE OF ITS COLOR. Mind you its not even anything like pink or purple. ITS. WHITE.
A SUBURBAN WHITE WOMAN TURNED RED IN THE FACE WITH ANGER BEAUSE SHE THOUGHT WHITE WAS TOO GIRLY FOR HER SON.
And the son is more mature than her.
- is overweight. not “a little heavy” or “curvy in all the right places”, she is overweight and she owns it.
- is gay, and from her first public exposure has been open about this
- has bipolar disorder
- is one of the coolest lyricists right now
- has this song which is way more feel good than “all about the bass” or “shake it off”
- is super cute
- mary lambert